How Turles Obtained the Tree of Might
by the1andonlyLucian
Summary: Exactly the title, so I made up a story for it enjoy


How Turles obtained The Tree of Might

Turles, a saiyan with palm like hair, dark tanned skin, still wearing his black and dark blue armour was stuck in a cell on Vegeta, with Kachin handcuffs, the strongest material in the universe, the only material strong enough to hold a saiyan. Caught for stealing and selling military property. Having been knocked out by the arresting soldiers he only just woke up. Looking around. He saw lots of bars and two guards, there were only two other cells but they were empty. Saiyans didn't keep prisoners for long.

He walked up to the bars and called over the guards. "Hey you boys wanna be paid lots of money?"

One of the guards laughed "Yeah right."

Turles continued "I got snatched for selling military equipment, I've sold crates upon crates of equipment making incredible amount of money, you get me outta here and I'll reward you handsomely. Think of it you can have what ever woman you want, the best alcohol, scouter, armour everything."

The guards looked at each other contemplating the offer.

Turles to ensure the message is improved he quickly reaches down to his boot, and opens a secret compartment in the back sole. Pulling out a handful of pure gold one ounce coins, he quickly stood up.

"look at this, this is chump change compared to what you'll be paid."

The guards turned then eyed the gold in his hands greedily.

A smirk crossed Turles' face.

The other guard then announced "Fine we'll look the other way, you get out yourself, we don't have access to the key or the code, only the captain of the guard has it on his person at all times. After your out, take us to the stash."

Turles then demanded "I want my equipment back."

The first guard then agreed "sure I'll get you your stuff."

The first guard then left.

Turles then walked to the back of the cell turned from them knelt down and opened a secret compartment in his other boot, in it was a Kachin lock pick and a miniature electrical lock pick.

Using the lock pick he skilfully unlocked and removed the handcuffs, then reaching through the Kachin bars he placed the electric lock pick which hacked into the electrical lock and opened it. Then quickly he stored everything away back in their compartments. Confidently he strolled casually out the cell.

The guard was shocked "How so fast ?"

Turles smiled "Not the first time I've been in a cell."

Then the other guard came back with his duffle bag. " Shit you were fast, you've done this before."

Turles smiled and grabbed the bag hoisting it over his shoulder. "Let's get you boys paid."

They then casually walked out the dungeon. As they were walking out into sunlight Turles looked up and to his horror he saw a giant Red ball of energy hurtling towards the planet. Quickly the three began running to any battle sphere ships close by in the employee parking lot. Turles shouts in anger "Shit" as the sphere sped up and slammed into the ground, the impact sent them to the ground backwards as the ground peeled backwards under their feet. Then a horrifying feeling of immeasurable heat engulfed them Turles felt his blood boil away, his flesh set alight with fire and fall off the bone, his hair burned away, the pain was beyond comprehension, he knew one thing he would die here and now.

Then suddenly the pain stopped he found himself in a line of white will o wisps, it was a strange place, red and blue ogre like creatures ran about in suits carrying either clipboards or clubs, in front of the line where it ended was a huge red ogre behind an equally huge desk.

Looking around he saw yellow clouds on either side of the walkway.

Getting bored he tried talking to the will o wisp in front of him. "Hello, what do you think this place is?"

The will o wisp shifted and spoke in a voice he recognised "Hey you sound like the guy I let out?"

Turles surprised looked carefully and concentrated on the will o wisp inside the puff of white smoke he saw the first guard. "Yes I am you are one of the guards, so do you think this is the afterlife?"

The guard surprised also concentrated and saw Turles through Turles's puff of smoke.

"It must be we were incinerated by a massive ball of energy."

Turles looked behind him and ahead of him constantly concentrating. What he saw shocked him, they were all saiyans, every saiyan on the planet must have died. The only person that he had heard if that had that amount of power to produce an energy attack of that size was Frieza.

Turles turned back to the guard and sadly stated "The saiyan race is dead." Then he grew angry "Frieza incinerated all of us. He is the only creature alive that has a level of power high enough to make an energy attack that large."

The guard looked around and saw what Turles saw. Shocked he only managed to say "Seems so".

Just then every one in front of Turles disappeared and he found himself in front of the huge red ogre. Shocked he only managed to say "What the? How?" He then heard a loud booming voice "You're dead, You're Turles Right?" Turles looked up and answered "Yes" the ogre announced "King Yemma Lifetime Judge, Turles looking at your file one massacred planet and a lifetime of piracy, you're going to Hell."

Turles shouted out "Hey, all third classes have to purge a planet to be accepted, we are ordered to when we are still basically toddlers. That's unfair."

Yemma ignoring the comment Stamped the file, the next instant Turles found himself alone in a wide red dirt canyon. In the distance he heard movement, wanting to get out he walked to the wall taking hours then started searching for an exit while walking towards the movement. Eventually he found a single will o wisp walking aimlessly down the middle of the canyon. Looking carefully he saw it was a green bald muscle bound humanoid alien in a type of dark brown armour, everything was covered except the joints, even his face, though it looked more of a helmet. Walking Turles called out "Hey you there, wanna get outta here?" The Alien hearing him turned and ran towards him. Turles unsure what the alien would do got in a fighting stance. The alien stopped just before reaching Turles "Gud, zum git ta talk ta, itz been agez"

Turles wary asked "So who are you and what race do you belong to."

The green alien "I'm Nek Znappa. I'm a Zork, wez the biggezt an da Ztrongezt. Oo ar yu?"

Turles seeing that he seemed a bit dim witted but strong smiled " I'm Turles, a saiyan, if you don't know were a warrior race."

Nek Znappa grinned a toothy grin "Zo ya like ta fight?"

Turles smirked "No we LOVE to fight."

Neck Znappa "Alroit letz see ow gud ya ar." The zork threw a punch at Turles who quickly dodged and countered with a punch of his own hitting the zork in the gut, the zork bent over in pain and in response charged the saiyan tackling him to the ground. Turles in pain from the crash pushed Nek off him and kicked him then he coated his tail in energy but it went right through the zork unaffected. Seeing that, he rolled away and got up. The zork started getting up. Turles charged at the zork and elbowed Nek's head the zork fell down unconscious, dislodging a long canine from the bottom jaw.

Turles nursed his pain and started examining the wall again. Soon his pain just disappeared and he felt vibrations from the Zork's location as the dirt shifted, heard a loud groan and smelt the zorks odour slowly get stronger as he heard him get closer.

Nek Znappa yelled "What ya lukin' for Boss?"

Turles said searching diligently as he walked "For a way out"

After many many hours of walking Turles learnt that in Zork society only the strongest became leaders. Eventually they came across an inward half circle in the canyon, walking further Turles looked across and saw a tree that was so huge it defied logic. The trunk was several hundred kilometres across and the top most branches were several thousand kilometres high. In the branches he saw ripe red fruit. Two Large muscle bound ogres guarded the tree with spears and had clubs tied to their belt. Getting an idea Turles talked to Nek Znappa "hey Nek Znappa, I want you to go over to those two and talk to them, distract them for as long as possible."

Nek Znappa clapped his hands "Alroit Boss"

He watched the zork walk over. Turles then lay prone on the ground covered himself in the red dirt and sneaked as best as he could to the tree.

When he got there Nek Znappa had just started talking to the ogres. Turles walked around the tree towards the back, when he was sure he could not be seen he tried climbing the tree but his hand went straight through. Remembering what happened with his tail being charged with energy and going through another dead person he concluded "So this can only be touched by some one that's alive like the ogres, and infusing my tail with energy makes it act like I was alive, I can touch martial things, like this tree."

Infusing energy into his hands and feet he started climbing as fast as he could for a long distance. As he climbed he studied the canyon wall behind the tree and soon found a crevice, mentally recording the location he looked back to wards the location every now and again to confirm its location so he could find it any where with in this area.

Eventually after half an hour he was at the lowers branch that had the ripe red fruit. Looking at it, the fruit was round like a ball but spiky and was larger than his hand. Coating his teeth and mouth in energy then upon taking a bite realised that it was the worst mistake he ever made, it tasted horrific like eating a rotten corpse. He was about to crush it when immediately he felt different, suddenly he felt alive again the white cloudiness surrounding him dissipated, and felt an insatiable hunger. Looking at the fruit in disgust he forced himself to eat the whole thing. Amazingly he felt full, he felt many times stronger than he ever was before he died. In his hand was the seed of the fruit. Unfortunately when he looked down he was completely naked, no armour no clothes nothing but the seed in his hand. He held the seed in his hand forming a fist completely concealing it. Looking down he saw Neck Znappa arguing with the ogres. Turles tossed in his mind whether he should allow the Zork to be rewarded. Taking a long look at the branches he flew to another ripe fruit , removed the seed hiding it in his butt cheeks and the rest of the fruit removed a leaf and wrapped it around the fruit. These leaves were huge, one could be worn as a kilt, but honestly Turles didn't care. Climbing down he sneaked back to where they first saw the tree and hid the fruit around the corner, covering the leaf in red dust. Then he signalled Nek Znappa to come back, after a while of signalling Nek saw the signal and

Stopped arguing, he thanked the ogres for the conversation with a punch and walked off.

"Wad Ya got? Ow cum ya loik dat?"

Turles made sure they were well hidden past the corner so the ogres couldn't see and handed the fruit to Nek. Turles warned "It tastes like a rotten corpse but makes you alive and fills you up."

Taking note of the warning Nek made a disgusted face twisting it so the least amount touched him.

Taking a bite and forcing it down seemed just as much a challenge to Neck as it did to Turles.

"Wow, I'm Not ded, but I'm Ungy." Forcing himself to take a bite and swallow, he immediately felt full. "Wow Dis Tazd bad but fild me up gud."

Turles "throw a punch at me."

Nek Following the order threw it, Turles looked disappointed, it was as if it was a normal person throwing a punch, a much much stronger than average person but nothing special.

Turles now had to make his investment worthwhile "Eat the rest, it will make you stronger."

Making a face Nek slowly consumed the rest. "Wow, Yur roit, I bet I can Take on Krork."

Turles curious asked "Whose that?"

Nek slapped his head "Roit yu donno itz the Zork's God."

Turles smirked "Throw a punch now."

Nek was happy to oblige. Turles saw it had decent speed so he stopped it with a hand grabbing the fist, it struck with a decent strength.

Nek "Wow lookz loik yuz stil da Boss. Boss Tur Lez."

Smirking Turles then ordered "Cover your skin with the red dirt like me, it acts like camouflage hiding us from the enemy as we move. Follow me, don't talk or make a sound and do what I do when I do it, understand?"

Nek "Yes Boss"

Nek then covered himself in the rest dust covering his green skin and bark like armour.

Turles then went prone and started crawling as fast as he could keeping an eye on the ogres. Whenever one of the ogres even remotely looks like he's going to turn his head towards them Turles stopped dead in his tracks as did Nek. Slowly they made their way to the tree. Now that they were finally behind the tree Turles looked at the wall and found the crevice again, putting the seed that was in his hand in his mouth he started climbing to the crevice he infused ki into his hands to cut into the rock to make easy hand and foot holes, not knowing Nek's climbing skill. Eventually they made it to the crevice and climbed in, it was twice as high and wide as they were, so they walked next to each other the crevice seemed to form a cave system that went up, eventually the cave only fit one person at a time . They were starting to feel tired but Turles pushed on, and seeing this Nek inspired pushed on as well. They began conversing about the types of lives each lived, Nek's was filled with endless battles with seemingly no other purpose than to generate war. Turles was filled with all his greatest thefts as well as his many one on one battles with military police and other enforcement agencies as well as his purge planet. Eventually they were able to see light but they really had to squeeze sideways between the rock, it scraped both their chests and back. Eventually they made it out. Turles saw two big boots filled by two large legs, looking up he saw a large desk and the back of King Yemma.

Turles getting an idea, sneaked through and made a hole in the wall next to Yemmas desk with the intention to make an improvised secret door installed with a peep hole. Turles motioned to Nek to get splinters of wood, by pushing the wooden desk until the wood panel broke on the corner, he then grabbed a splinter and pulled until it broke off, the splinter was as tall as him. Following his instruction Nek started doing the same. Turles then covered his hand in energy held it out like a knife and started cutting through the wall making a peep hole. When he saw no one was looking he quickly cut a archway door in a single movement. Holding the door in place he then cut the facades off taking a bit of the wall facade as well. Carefully he took the cut wall facade, and placed it on the ground. Then he removed the rear facade of the door, and cut out the plaster. Then he started cutting in between the wall removing the plaster making a place where the door will slide into. Looking at Nek , he motioned with his free hand that enough wood splinters were accumulated. Letting go the front facade didn't move so he walked to the new hole in the desk and searched for some glue and a spring. Finding a oversized tube of super glue and a oversized paper clip he modified the paper clip to become a leaf spring. He then used the cut pieces of paper clip to drill into wood splinters where the spring would fit. Then he used the super glue to glue those pieces to both facades of the door, thin splinters were put in side the wall so the facades would not be marked when they slide in the wall. He then connected the spring and installed it to the two facades then he looked through the peep hole saw it was clear and pushed the leaf spring into the wall, slightly opening the door. He then quickly closed it. Then he began Woking on the facade on Yemmas side. He used the super glue to glue back the cut pieces of wall facades that were cut when he made the door. Looking at his handy work one wouldn't know there was a door here. They then began cleaning all the plaster off the ground and stored it in the hole in the desk.

When it was clear they began moving the panel aside and the facades were squeezed by the spring and slid into the hole in the wall. They then sneaked through ,Turles Closed the door clicking it back in place. The facade was untouched and it looked like the rest of the wall. Turles then thought to himself ' that was a great job but If we are indeed alive shouldn't we be returned to the world of the living?' Looking for an run of the mill ogre with a clipboard he stopped sneaking and blew off all the red dust with an energy blast of air, cleaning both him and Nek.

Nek seeing that his Boss was no longer sneaking asked "Wotz da plan Boss?"

Turles removing the seed from his mouth he dried it off with his hands wrapped his tail round his waist and hid the seed where the tail overlaps with his spine "We find some one to send us back to the world of the living. We are still in the afterlife."

Nek "Do I get ta Bonk sum gitz?"

Turles sighed "Unfortunately, this requires Politics, not war, so no. When we are on a planet we can have some fun on the population."

Nek saddened he could not kill anyone but happy that he would get to kill lots of people later. "Alroit Boss No Bonkin'"

Turles then walked up to what he assumed was a female blue ogre in a three piece suit with a clip board and glasses, it had two bumps in the chest area and had long hair put in a bun. Her face looked pretty for an alien, so did her body and he had seduced many aliens before with many skin colours, so this was nothing new. Putting on some charm he smiled and walked up to her "Hello Miss, there seems to be a misunderstanding, my friend and I are not dead, yet we are here, can you make it so that we are sent back to the world of the living?"

The blue ogress's cheeks turned beet red at the sight of Turles' nudity, his green friend however seemed to have some sort of natural bark armour covering everything except the back of the joints, the front and sides seemed to overlap and fit over the whole font of the joint like it was custom made.

Trying to compose herself she tried to calm herself down but then Turles seeing this smirked and purposely walked closer to her destroying her composure. "I'm sorry, I didn't introduce myself, My name is Turles, This is Nek, what is your name, it sure will be as beautiful as you are."

Gulping getting hot she quickly let out "Lith, I'm Lith."

Turles wrapping his arm round her waist asked "well Lith, that definitely matches with your wonderful long legs." Causing her to get even more flustered. He then reiterated "Could you do us a favour and get us to the same planet with all our belongings, including a ship. Negating the infuriatingly difficult paperwork, it help both you as well as my friend and I. I'm sure you want to dodge all the complexities and bore that paper work brings, right, Lith long legs."

Lith Gulped "I'll see what I can do." Quickly she turned and walked fast looking at a couple of car park areas before finding a vehicle, getting in and driving off, to check Turles flew up and watched her drive, she stopped at an office building and went in.

Satisfied Turles flew down.

Nek "Woa, Yu can fly wid out wingz?"

Turles " Yes I can, why do you have wings hidden some where?"

Nek "Nah da zmart Zork's make em an onli da krazist wonz ov us use em, dar kald da fly boyz. Me self I loik bein' on a tank, or truk, or boik, but I'm almozt alwayz on foot. Zee, I'm a Zhoota Boy, b'for da lazt battle I was just a Boy wez get a won 'anded gun

an a sord an maybez a nade. On da rankz wez da lowezt, Afta da battle iz found a bigga gun an became a Zhoota boy, den da next battle got zhot ta pizez by a gun dat zhot light."

Turles curious asked " what is a nade?what are all the ranks then?"

Nek " welp a nade iz a nade, it luk loik da ferut, wez ate, ya pulz a uzeles fing, frow da Ferut lukin fing an it go boom.

Roit rankz furst darez da Boyz, den da zhoota Boyz wid bigga gunz, an da flamar Boyz wid a flamar, an da roket Boyz wid roket launchaz, dem free ar aboutz da zame leval, den da fly boyz wid wingz an moddad gunz, an da zneaky boyz wid moddad gunz an sordz, dem tu ar da zame, den yu get a zmart boy who makez all da ztuff.

den yu get a Boss in 'arge of a numba ov eatch type ov boyz, den yu get a Big Boss in 'arge of a numba ov Bossez, den at de end yu get a Warboss in 'arge of alz the Big Bossez an evryone, alzo the WarBoss Getz 'iz own band o Zmart Boyz to makez im da bezt ztuff."

Turles "Hmm, sounds like a standard military setup to me."

After the conversation, half an hour passed and finally Lith could be seen driving back with another passenger wearing a three piece suit.

Lith still couldn't compose herself and neither could her female Companion. Lith then stated "My friend here can transport you and your friend to a planet and she can reform your equipment here, as long as you can carry it." Looking to her friend who with a look encourages her. Turning back to Turles continuing " But First I want something from you, you have had me feeling hot and bothered all day. It's time you repaid me."

Turles smirking then lifted up a finger "I'd absolutely love to ravish you but first I want my armour set and all my equipment." Lith huffed then relented "fine, imagine your armour and your equipment, that you owned and not something you didn't because the spell won't work on that item. My friend here will recreate it from either wherever it is or it's atoms." Closing his eyes he imagined all his equipment. Her friend started chanting and soon he heard things land on the ground. Opening his eyes he saw his armour set, battle undies and his duffle bag filled with stuff. When he opened it, it contained everything that was in there, a scouter, a tablet and a change of armour with the same colour scheme. Looking at the boots, he was relieved that they had the secret compartments filled with the correct things, just like they were. His pod ship was next to the armour set. It was a white sphere with a circular red window in the dead centre. He opened the hatch door and stored all the equipment into the pod via draws including the two seeds. Then he opened a draw pulled out a fresh sheet and pressed a button. The inside of the pod morphed into a circular bed then he covered the bed with the sheet. He turned towards Lith and signalled her over, his penis immediately grew and stood up as he knew what was coming next.

Lith blushing ran to him to cover him up with her body, his penis upwards pressing against her belly. He carried her into the pod and closed the hatch when they were inside. Turles started kissing her and she responded in kind, Lith took off her jacket and vest. Turles felt her breasts, feeling extra material he reached around and expertly unclasped the bra through her blouse. Lith pulled off the shirt and threw off her bra. Turles seemed to like that as his penis beat against her stomach. Turles groped one of her breasts with one hand and kissed an area on the neck that seemed to elicit pleasure from Lith. Lith undid her pants as Turles tried to pull down her pants. Turles other hand grabbed her arse then pulled down her undies. Lith kicked off her pants and undies and straddled Turles. He then kissed from her neck down to her breast and both sucked and licked her nipple eliciting even more pleasure. Then his hand that was on her arse moved to the front of her and he put two fingers inside her vagina rubbing her clitoris as they went in and out. She had to pleasure him now so she twisted around and put his penis in her mouth sucking it, eliciting pleasure from Turles. Lith felt his penis release a tiny amount of ejaculation. Sucking it again she sucked it all up and swallowed the semen eliciting pleasure from the saiyan. Turles stopped rubbing her clit and turned her round and rolled on top, inserted his penis into her vagina and started moving in and out rhythmically. While one hand groped her breast the other was on the bed holding him up. He made sure with every movement his pubic hair rubbed against her clitoris eliciting extra pleasure as he rhythmically moved in and out.

Eventually he came to a climax as did Lith as they groaned together in pleasure.

They lied there then Lith turned round and sucked Turles off once more sort of cleaning his penis. Turles then reached a hand up, opened a draw pulling out a box. It was filled with antibacterial wipes, he handed some to Lith and she began cleaning herself. Turles grabbed some for himself and cleaned himself as well. Turles opened a draw and put in his first dirty wipe in there. Seeing this Lith understood and put hers in there as well. Then Lith got dressed as best as she could. Turles then put on his battle undies and armour set on. Opening the hatch they saw Nek Znappa, with all his equipment, a few grenades, a thick metal sword, sheathed and basically what amounted to a hand cannon type automatic pistol with a very wide diameter barrel similar to a twenty gauge shotgun and a box magazine in front of the trigger guard in a holster, and a rifle laying on the ground with an even bigger diameter similar to a twelve gauge shotgun and a longer barrel with an even larger box magazine that could hold even longer rounds. Nek Znappa was play sparring with the other woman.

It was a funny sight, seeing the woman try to trip the Zork and trip herself instead, though she used the correct technique but the Zork was too strong and only used all his strength. Getting up quickly she threw a very well thrown haymaker using her entire body weight, which was easily caught and thrown aside. Clearly she had picked up how to punch during the sparring session.

Turles laughing "Hey Nek Znappa, I think you've trained her enough. Let's get back to the world of the living."

Lith walked to the car and adjusted her hair. The Friend then called out "All right you two, let's get you back to the living world. Grab your Sphere and stand here." Pointing to a spot on the ground within her reaching distance. Turles then closed the hatch and lifted the sphere on his shoulders and walked. Nek Znappa picked up his rifle and stood next to her.

When Turles was near enough the spell caster asked "So you want a planet with spaceships. I'll see what I can do." Then she placed a hand on each of their shoulders and began chanting again only this time it was to a different tune with different sounds.

The next moment they found themselves standing in a spaceship graveyard.

Continued in The Crusher Corps.


End file.
